25 Poppasome Tokens of Appreciation

You know what we all have time to do?  Peel a million fuckin’ apples and make applesauce.  I mean…they don’t sell the stuff in jars at the store, right?

Sorry.  I’m a little bitter after doing what I just said.  Let me set a scene:

It’s apple season–praise Autumn!  (Well, kind of Autumn) So, JoJo and I got a bunch of Gala apples.  But…they just weren’t that good.  They were a little tough, hard to bite into and chew–the flavor was there, but it just wasn’t worth the trouble.  Because of this–about 20 Gala apples sat on the kitchen table in a big bowl for a week.  Finally, I knew that something had to be done or good produce (and money) was being wasted.

I decided to make homemade applesauce–which I haven’t done in years.  It’s super easy–just time-consuming and labor-intensive.  So, of course, I had to use it for a Yum-Yum Friday post.  You’re welcome.

Let’s get to it:


10 cups of peel, cored, and chopped Gala apples (about 20 apples)

1/2 cup brown sugar

1/2 cup granulated white sugar

1/2 tsp salt

2 tbsp butter (1/4 of a stick)

2 tsp cinnamon

Juice of 1 lemon (zest, too, if you like)

1 cup water (or 1 cup of apple juice or apple cider–dealer’s choice)

First things first–you get to peel, core, and chop your apples.  I started with a vegetable peeler, said “to hell with this” and just got out a paring knife.  It went a lot quicker after that–and I surprisingly didn’t cut myself once.  If you’re not handy with a paring knife, stick to a vegetable peeler, though.  That first pic is my garbage bowl and my dutch oven full of chopped Gala apples.  The next picture is just the chopped apples looking all pretty.


Next, add your brown sugar, white sugar, cinnamon, salt, lemon juice (and zest if using), and water to the apples.  Yes.  You need the salt and lemon juice.  Don’t question me.


Cover your cooking vessel and put it over a low simmer.  That’s about a 3/4 on my electric stove.

And just let it cook, giving it a stir occasionally.  Starting at the left, that is 15 minutes into cooking, then 25 minutes, then 35 minutes.

Remove your cooking vessel from the heat and immediately add the 2 tbsp of butter (I ended up using 4 tbsp accidentally–but don’t do that), stirring continuously (but carefully) until it is completely melted.  Yes, butter.  In applesauce.  Trust me on this.  Be “hood” like me and put butter in your applesauce.  You’ll thank me later.

The picture on the left shows the applesauce’s stage of being broken down after stirring in the butter.  That’s not smooth enough for Allen.  I like a bit smoother and a little less chunky applesauce.

Look, if you want to be high-tech, get your food processor or blender out.  As I’ve said–I’m hood as hell–so I just got out the potato masher.  A little elbow grease, and…


We have yummy applesauce!  If you want it really smooth and velvety, though, I definitely suggest putting your hood tendencies aside and using a food processor, blender, or immersion blender.  But, you do you, boo.

Now all you have to do is pour it into a covered container and put it in the fridge.  If the applesauce didn’t cool down enough during the butter, mashing, stirring phase, let it set on the counter for a while to cool down before sticking it in the fridge.  No one needs food poisoning.  Once it’s cold, it’s ready to eat.  Of course, it’s fine to eat warm, too.  Warm applesauce with some pork chops?  Fuggedaboutit.  I just prefer it cold.

You can also can your applesauce (which I am not teaching you on this Yum-Yum Friday ’cause I don’t have time for that bullshit) if you don’t think you’ll eat it very quickly.  However, this batch should last up to 2 weeks in the fridge as is, so if you’ll eat it during that period of time, why bother with canning??

Until next time…


13 thoughts on “Yum-Yum Friday: Homemade Applesauce

  1. This sounds yummy but if there’s anything I hate, it’s peeling fruits and veggies. I will peel apples for Shane’s apple pie for Thanksgiving only because I grew him in my uterus and love him unconditionally. LOL

  2. You can also do the same with Red cabbage in a slow cooker on the lowest setting for about 3 hours. You can also add a bit of cider to help soften the cabbage. Its a great side dish with Christmas dinner! Looks great!

          1. Whenever I hear “applesauce” my first thoughts are pork chops and applesauce via The Brady Bunch. Just how my brain works. Anyway, yum. I know this isn’t something I’ll ever make because I rarely cook, but now I want hot apple pie ala mode! Because that’s also how my brain works! I may have to settle for apple-flavored oatmeal with extra cinnamon thrown in. Hmm. Mona

              1. Or throw a little port salut on and that would be amazing as well! Hey, if you ever get a chance, you should take JoJo to Lazy Dog — they have one in Addison and one in Plano. I like the Plano location better because I just think they have better cooks there. I recommend the apple/huckleberry tart! So effin good! It comes with ice cream, but I bet they’d throw cheese on it if you prefer!

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