Sometimes You Need a Complete Stranger to Tell You That You Are Not a Weirdo

I can be effusive and a little crazy.  Did you know that?

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When I really enjoy something, adore it, fall in love with something…I can get a little too “squee” about it.  Ever have a dog that’s really happy to see you come running at you and for a split second, you’re unsure if they’re about to attack you with their teeth or their tongue?  That’s a pretty good visual for how I behave sometimes.

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Ya’ know, the world is a hot damn mess.  There’s so much to hate about it at times.  People are awful.  They’re so quick to try and put you down, cut you off at the knees, and just ruin what might have started out as a good day.  There’s a lot of ugliness.  We all know it.  We try to act like everything is fine…but everything is not fine a lot of the time.

Because of this–when something is really wonderful (read: not horrible), I tend to get super excited about it.  When I meet a person, read a book, see a movie, have an experience where I’m inspired, touched, or treated nicely, my whole body swells up with happiness.  And I must do something with those feelings.  Granted, I don’t understand social norms so my reactions can be a little creepy to others.

Recently, I read a book that an author I follow on Twitter wrote (you’ll read all about it next month during my monthly book review).  And I just adored it.  And then I found out more about the author (you’ll read about that in the future, too, hopefully), and it made me love the book and author more.  So, how else would I handle this but DM the author directly and act like a complete stalker/weirdo?

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As I did it, I realized that I was acting like a total creeper.  Look–since everything can be so awful in this world–we’ve all kind of become suspicious of polite, nice behavior.  When someone is really nice to me, my first thought is “this person wants something”.  That thought is directly followed up with “Oh, my God.  I’m going to end up in a pit in this person’s basement”.

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And let’s be honest – there’s a lot of me.  I’m a prime target for cannibals and/or skin-clothes makers.  Side note to cannibals/skin-clothes makers – I will raise your cholesterol and I have stretch marks.  But I’m also awkward so I’ll probably compliment you on your cooking and sewing skills–and possibly your table manners.

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So, when I wrapped up my DM to her, I said “And now that you probably think I’m a complete weirdo, I’ll lob the ball back into your court.”  ‘Cause, manners, right?

Anyhoozles, it was less than a few hours before she responded to my DM–answering my questions kindly.  She included the statement “And I don’t think you’re a complete weirdo”.

And there it was.  I felt validated.  BY. A. STRANGER.

Sometimes, that’s just what you need.  You need to be allowed to actually be happy.  To be effusive and grateful and fanatical and…human.  You need a complete and utter stranger to let you be kind–and then be kind in return.  To not act like your happiness and kindness is creepy.  You need a stranger to tell you that you’re not a weirdo.

Maybe we should all make it common practice?

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Until next time…

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10 comments

  1. I have DM’d or tweeted to authors whose work I enjoyed and they have always been totally gracious. One even said at a book reading that he appreciates it and wishes people would do it more often because sometimes it’s what you need to keep going. I totally agree – it’s so nice to hear that what you write is resonating. so often, bloggers operate in a vacuum… I appreciate the feedback. long story short, you’re doing it right! & thank you!

  2. I think you’re a bit of weirdo, but that’s a good thing. Normal people bore the shit out of me. Normal people keep to themselves and don’t say anything because they’d rather keep silent than say the wrong thing and SCREW THAT. Whenever I post, oh, let’s say a piece of fan fiction I’ve written, the comments that make me smile the most are the ones that are like, “OMG THAT IS AWESOMMMMMME!! I AM LITERALLY CRYING RIGHT NOW I HATE YOU I AM FEELING EVERYTHING!!!” Which, let’s be real, a not-weird person probably would not write. So, ya know, weird is awesome. Be weird.

    Although, I am glad that this author appreciated your message and made you feel validated and less awkward about sending it.

  3. I second Mona on that…remember I always say, “Stay weird. Normal is boring.” I even put it on a T-shirt! LOL

    We all have those fanboy/fangirl moments. When The Bloggess started following me back on Twitter, I could’ve easily dropped a deuce on someone’s lawn because I was THAT excited. Yes, I realize she follows something like 40,000 people, but it was still awesome.

    We all need that validation from a stranger too. I’ve been told my whole life by people I know that I should be a writer, but it’s very easy to think they’re just people who love me and want me to feel good about myself. Kind of like all those poor people who go try out for American Idol because people told them they could sing and they ended up screeching and ruining a perfectly good song in front of millions of people. It wasn’t until total strangers started following my blog and telling me I made them laugh that I actually started to believe I MIGHT be able to pull this off! So never lose your weirdness. That what sets you apart from the wannabes! 🙂

    • I couldn’t lose it if I tried. It followed me home one day when I went out for milk—ok, AND cookies—and refuses to leave. That was 30 years ago, so I think this is just how it is. 🤪

  4. You and me both! Though, a well-known author dropping deuces on people’s lawns? Hmm…that might make for a delicious scandal! I can see the headlines now! Okay, I did not just say delicious right after we were talking about poop! Ewww!

  5. I’m glad you were validated; presumably, not by the same stranger that came into my neighborhood…ahem… we’ll just try and leave him out of this! Everyone’s got a little weird in them, even boring people–they just hide it better! Which is why they come across as — boring. Creative people, though? They just can’t help themselves. Besides, one person’s weird is someone else’s perfectly normal. Never quit being you, Allen! We like you just the way you ares! I refer you back to the Angel Who Swears blog to re-read Kat’s motto! BTW, the whole cannibal riff made me giggle! Love it. And that’s why I keep reading your blog/book. I hope I’m not coming across like I’m being too stalker-ish! Oh, well, it is what it is.

    TTFN,

    Mona

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