I can be effusive and a little crazy. Did you know that?
When I really enjoy something, adore it, fall in love with something…I can get a little too “squee” about it. Ever have a dog that’s really happy to see you come running at you and for a split second, you’re unsure if they’re about to attack you with their teeth or their tongue? That’s a pretty good visual for how I behave sometimes.
Ya’ know, the world is a hot damn mess. There’s so much to hate about it at times. People are awful. They’re so quick to try and put you down, cut you off at the knees, and just ruin what might have started out as a good day. There’s a lot of ugliness. We all know it. We try to act like everything is fine…but everything is not fine a lot of the time.
Because of this–when something is really wonderful (read: not horrible), I tend to get super excited about it. When I meet a person, read a book, see a movie, have an experience where I’m inspired, touched, or treated nicely, my whole body swells up with happiness. And I must do something with those feelings. Granted, I don’t understand social norms so my reactions can be a little creepy to others.
Recently, I read a book that an author I follow on Twitter wrote (you’ll read all about it next month during my monthly book review). And I just adored it. And then I found out more about the author (you’ll read about that in the future, too, hopefully), and it made me love the book and author more. So, how else would I handle this but DM the author directly and act like a complete stalker/weirdo?
As I did it, I realized that I was acting like a total creeper. Look–since everything can be so awful in this world–we’ve all kind of become suspicious of polite, nice behavior. When someone is really nice to me, my first thought is “this person wants something”. That thought is directly followed up with “Oh, my God. I’m going to end up in a pit in this person’s basement”.
And let’s be honest – there’s a lot of me. I’m a prime target for cannibals and/or skin-clothes makers. Side note to cannibals/skin-clothes makers – I will raise your cholesterol and I have stretch marks. But I’m also awkward so I’ll probably compliment you on your cooking and sewing skills–and possibly your table manners.
So, when I wrapped up my DM to her, I said “And now that you probably think I’m a complete weirdo, I’ll lob the ball back into your court.” ‘Cause, manners, right?
Anyhoozles, it was less than a few hours before she responded to my DM–answering my questions kindly. She included the statement “And I don’t think you’re a complete weirdo”.
And there it was. I felt validated. BY. A. STRANGER.
Sometimes, that’s just what you need. You need to be allowed to actually be happy. To be effusive and grateful and fanatical and…human. You need a complete and utter stranger to let you be kind–and then be kind in return. To not act like your happiness and kindness is creepy. You need a stranger to tell you that you’re not a weirdo.
Maybe we should all make it common practice?
Until next time…