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Spring Ain’t All Bad

If you’ve been following The Midnight Goose for the last few weeks, you know that my seasonal allergies have got me looking into how much flights to Antarctica cost.  I mean–it’s technically a desert, and they only have one season–so that should cure any seasonal allergy issues I have.  Right?  And penguins are cute.  I mean, ever since I saw March of the Penguins, I’ve wanted to tackle and hug the shit out of an Emperor Penguin.  I’ve also wanted Morgan Freeman to narrate every move I make, every single day, since then, too.

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Don’t tell me you don’t want to just bite one of these fuckers’ faces off they’re so cute!

Anyhoozles…I’ve been bitching.  A lot.  Like so much that my blood is more than its usual 50% evil at this point.  I’m not gonna lie–it’s hovering around 95% currently.  However, in an effort to combat this situation, and maybe reverse some of the effects, I thought I’d make a list of spring things that I actually enjoy–even if spring has me like this:

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So, here we go…a list of ten things I love about spring:

  1. It’s no longer cold as a witch’s tit, nor is it hot enough to make butt gravy.
  2. The extra sunlight and longer daylight hours chase off the Seasonal Affective Disorder…so it’s not like The Shining around Casa de Fatass. (though JoJo is still trying to put an axe in my skull)
  3. I can actually open the house windows after a long, cold winter.  It’s nice to blow the stank out the house erry once in a while.
  4. Flowers.  Flowers are pretty.
  5. You can go back to wearing shorts when you make a quick jaunt to the corner store without fifty-seven people asking “Aren’t you cold?!?!”
  6. Birds chirping cheerfully are nice–even if I do want to pepper them with buckshot in the early morning hours for disturbing my sleep.
  7. Easter, Cinco de Mayo, Mother’s Day, Memorial Day, and Father’s Day all occur–which, let’s be honest, they’re all just excuses to eat indulgently.
  8. It’s not yet summer–so the temperatures are nice, but not too hot, and all the kids are still in school.  I don’t have any young kids living with me–but I don’t want to see other people’s at a matinee, either.
  9. Outdoor reading is actually possible without freezing or burning up.  And any activity that revolves around reading gets my vote!
  10. There are no gift-giving holidays during spring (of which I know).

So, hopefully making this list will help rebalance my Karma.  Namaste.

Until next time…

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Allen T. St. Clair is an author, blogger, amateur cook, and all-around smartass, hustling to get his books and other projects noticed.

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